Jane 
I was once the same, dreading milestone birthdays, imagining that life with endless possibilities was passing me by. To me, the scarcity of life’s chances was commensurate with getting older and having less opportunities.
I was wrong but I have learnt the lesson through becoming a midlifer or middle aged. Life doesn’t diminish as you get older. Quite the opposite, as the photo of me in Malaysia taken in June shows. I felt on top of the world as I explored new possibilities post retirement.
To go back to my original point about people dreading big birthdays, I am increasing coming across people turning 30 or 40 lamenting ‘getting old’ and who are celebrating their birthdays with dismay rather than delight.
I remember feeling the same dread at turning 30 and 40. But I was wrong and as are these young people. I want to tell them that they aren’t old and, more importantly, there’s nothing to fear from the ageing process but I know that it will fall on deaf ears. Such is the narrative and strength of society viewing getting older as a form of invisible disability.
As people live longer the definition of ‘old’ shifts too. I am in my 60s and I know for a fact that that was considered ‘old’ in the 70s and 80s because people lived shorter lives at that time. That isn’t the case anymore but society’s views hasn’t moved on.
Just look at how older women are vilified for daring to have wrinkles. Beauty is celebrated as a wrinkle free face zone. How unrealistic but when has reality touched beauty standards for women?
Beauty and wrinkles aside, growing older is a privilege especially post Covid when large numbers of people died at all ages. If the Covid age taught me anything it is that simply being alive, literally, is a gift in itself.
Have a good week.
